2 Samuel 13 Study Notes: Amnon, Tamar and Absalom's Revenge
David's son Amnon, helped by a scheme from his cousin Jonadab, rapes his half-sister Tamar and then casts her out. David is angry but does nothing, and two years later Absalom has Amnon killed at a feast and flees to Geshur for three years.
General
Where did Absalom go after Amnon’s death, and how did David’s heart turn by the chapter’s end (2 Samuel 13:37-39)?
Answer: To Geshur; David came to long for him
Absalom fled to Talmai, king of Geshur (13:37), who was his mother’s father (3:3), and remained there for three years (13:38). David mourned, but in time he was comforted concerning Amnon and longed to go out to Absalom (13:39). The chapter closes with a murderer in exile and a father whose heart was drawn to him, which sets up Joab’s scheme in the next chapter (14:1).
- 2 Samuel 13:37-38 (BSB)“Now Absalom fled and went to Talmai son of Ammihud, the king of Geshur. But David mourned for his son every day. After Absalom had fled and gone to Geshur, he stayed there three years.”Absalom flees to Talmai king of Geshur and stays there three years.
- 2 Samuel 13:39 (BSB)“And King David longed to go to Absalom, for he had been consoled over Amnon’s death.”David, consoled over Amnon, longs to go out to Absalom.
- 2 Samuel 3:3 (BSB)“his second was Chileab, by Abigail the widow of Nabal of Carmel; his third was Absalom, the son of Maacah daughter of King Talmai of Geshur;”Absalom’s mother Maacah was the daughter of Talmai king of Geshur.
- 2 Samuel 14:1 (BSB)“Now Joab son of Zeruiah perceived that the king’s heart longed for Absalom.”Joab sees that the king’s heart is set on Absalom, which drives the next chapter.
Theological
To whom did Absalom flee, and what was David’s disposition toward him at the end of 2 Samuel 13?
Answer: To Geshur; David came to long for him
Absalom took refuge with Talmai king of Geshur (13:37), his maternal grandfather (3:3), and remained three years (13:38). David, consoled concerning Amnon, came to long for Absalom (13:39). The unresolved tension between justice and a father’s affection becomes the ground of Joab’s intervention in chapter 14 (14:1).
- 2 Samuel 13:37-38 (BSB)“Now Absalom fled and went to Talmai son of Ammihud, the king of Geshur. But David mourned for his son every day. After Absalom had fled and gone to Geshur, he stayed there three years.”Absalom flees to Talmai king of Geshur and stays there three years.
- 2 Samuel 13:39 (BSB)“And King David longed to go to Absalom, for he had been consoled over Amnon’s death.”David, consoled over Amnon, longs to go out to Absalom.
- 2 Samuel 3:3 (BSB)“his second was Chileab, by Abigail the widow of Nabal of Carmel; his third was Absalom, the son of Maacah daughter of King Talmai of Geshur;”Absalom’s mother Maacah was the daughter of Talmai king of Geshur.
- 2 Samuel 14:1 (BSB)“Now Joab son of Zeruiah perceived that the king’s heart longed for Absalom.”Joab sees that the king’s heart is set on Absalom, which drives the next chapter.
General
Two years later at his sheepshearing feast, what order did Absalom give his young men (2 Samuel 13:28)?
Answer: To kill Amnon once wine had made him merry
Absalom waited two full years (13:23). He invited David and all his sons to his sheepshearing at Baal-hazor; when David declined, Absalom pressed him to send Amnon, and the king sent all his sons (13:24-27). Absalom had told his young men to watch until wine had made Amnon merry and then strike him down at his command, and they did as he ordered (13:28-29). The hatred Absalom had kept hidden became murder; John calls hatred of a brother murder (1 John 3:15), and the scene recalls Cain, who killed his brother in the field (Genesis 4:8).
- 2 Samuel 13:28 (BSB)“Now Absalom had ordered his young men, “Watch Amnon until his heart is merry with wine, and when I order you to strike Amnon down, you are to kill him. Do not be afraid. Have I not commanded you? Be courageous and valiant!””Absalom gives his servants their orders for the feast.
- 2 Samuel 13:29 (BSB)“So Absalom’s young men did to Amnon just as Absalom had ordered. Then all the other sons of the king got up, and each one fled on his mule.”Absalom’s servants carry out his order.
- 1 John 3:15 (BSB)“Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that eternal life does not reside in a murderer.”John calls anyone who hates his brother a murderer.
- Genesis 4:8 (BSB)“Then Cain said to his brother Abel, “Let us go out to the field.” And while they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel and killed him.”Cain killed his brother Abel while they were out in the field.
Theological
What instructions did Absalom give his servants at the feast at Baal-hazor (2 Samuel 13:28)?
Answer: To kill Amnon once wine had made him merry
After two years (13:23), Absalom engineered the occasion, pressing David to send Amnon to his sheepshearing (13:24-27). His servants were to wait until wine had made Amnon merry and then kill him on command, which they did (13:28-29). Concealed hatred ends in premeditated murder, as John equates hatred of a brother with murder (1 John 3:15), and the scene recalls Cain’s killing of Abel in the field (Genesis 4:8).
- 2 Samuel 13:28 (BSB)“Now Absalom had ordered his young men, “Watch Amnon until his heart is merry with wine, and when I order you to strike Amnon down, you are to kill him. Do not be afraid. Have I not commanded you? Be courageous and valiant!””Absalom gives his servants their orders for the feast.
- 2 Samuel 13:29 (BSB)“So Absalom’s young men did to Amnon just as Absalom had ordered. Then all the other sons of the king got up, and each one fled on his mule.”Absalom’s servants carry out his order.
- 1 John 3:15 (BSB)“Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that eternal life does not reside in a murderer.”John calls anyone who hates his brother a murderer.
- Genesis 4:8 (BSB)“Then Cain said to his brother Abel, “Let us go out to the field.” And while they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel and killed him.”Cain killed his brother Abel while they were out in the field.
General
How did Absalom treat Amnon after Tamar was wronged (2 Samuel 13:22)?
Answer: He said nothing at all to him, out of hatred
Absalom spoke neither good nor bad to Amnon, because he hated him for violating Tamar (13:22). His silence was not peace but concealed hatred. The law had told Israel not to harbor hatred against a brother in the heart, to rebuke openly instead, and not to seek revenge (Leviticus 19:17-18). Paul repeats that God’s people must not avenge themselves but leave judgment to God (Romans 12:19). Absalom’s grievance was real, yet he kept his anger hidden and planned his own revenge.
- 2 Samuel 13:22 (BSB)“And Absalom never said a word to Amnon, either good or bad, because he hated Amnon for violating his sister Tamar.”Absalom says nothing to Amnon because he hates him for what he did to Tamar.
- Leviticus 19:17-18 (BSB)“You must not harbor hatred against your brother in your heart. Directly rebuke your neighbor, so that you will not incur guilt on account of him. Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against any of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the LORD.”The law forbade harboring hatred in the heart or seeking revenge, and called for direct rebuke instead.
- Romans 12:19 (BSB)“Do not avenge yourselves, beloved, but leave room for God’s wrath. For it is written: “Vengeance is Mine; I will repay, says the Lord.””Vengeance belongs to God; His people are not to avenge themselves.
Theological
What does the narrator say about Absalom’s response to Amnon in 2 Samuel 13:22?
Answer: He said nothing at all to him, out of hatred
Absalom maintained complete silence toward Amnon, neither good nor bad, for he hated him for violating Tamar (13:22). This is the very thing the law forbade: harboring hatred in the heart rather than open rebuke, and nursing revenge (Leviticus 19:17-18). Vengeance belongs to the Lord (Romans 12:19). Absalom’s cause was just, but his hidden hatred ripens into premeditated murder.
- 2 Samuel 13:22 (BSB)“And Absalom never said a word to Amnon, either good or bad, because he hated Amnon for violating his sister Tamar.”Absalom says nothing to Amnon because he hates him for what he did to Tamar.
- Leviticus 19:17-18 (BSB)“You must not harbor hatred against your brother in your heart. Directly rebuke your neighbor, so that you will not incur guilt on account of him. Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against any of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the LORD.”The law forbade harboring hatred in the heart or seeking revenge, and called for direct rebuke instead.
- Romans 12:19 (BSB)“Do not avenge yourselves, beloved, but leave room for God’s wrath. For it is written: “Vengeance is Mine; I will repay, says the Lord.””Vengeance belongs to God; His people are not to avenge themselves.
General
How did Amnon’s feelings toward Tamar change after he had wronged her (2 Samuel 13:15)?
Answer: He hated her more than he had once desired her
Amnon’s desire turned to hatred of Tamar, more intensely than he had ever claimed to love her (13:15). He ordered her out, and when she protested that sending her away was a still greater wrong, he would not listen but had his servant put her outside and lock her out (13:16-17). What Amnon had called love was selfish desire; real love is patient and kind and does not seek its own way (1 Corinthians 13:4-5). James describes this same path: evil desire conceives sin, and sin grown full brings death (James 1:14-15), which is where Amnon’s story ends.
- 2 Samuel 13:15 (BSB)“Then Amnon hated Tamar with such intensity that his hatred was greater than the love he previously had. “Get up!” he said to her. “Be gone!””Amnon’s feelings turn to a hatred stronger than his former desire.
- 2 Samuel 13:16-17 (BSB)““No,” she replied, “sending me away is worse than this great wrong you have already done to me!” But he refused to listen to her. Instead, he called to his attendant and said, “Throw this woman out and bolt the door behind her!””Tamar protests that sending her away is worse, but Amnon has her thrown out.
- 1 Corinthians 13:4-5 (BSB)“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no account of wrongs.”True love is patient, kind and not self-seeking, the opposite of what Amnon called love.
- James 1:14-15 (BSB)“But each one is tempted when by his own evil desires he is lured away and enticed. Then after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.”Evil desire conceives and gives birth to sin, and sin when full-grown brings death.
Theological
What does the narrator say about Amnon’s attitude toward Tamar immediately after the crime (2 Samuel 13:15)?
Answer: He hated her more than he had once desired her
The narrator records a sudden reversal: Amnon’s hatred for Tamar exceeded the love he had professed (13:15). He drove her out, ignored her protest that this was a further wrong, and had her thrown out with the door bolted behind her (13:16-17). His so-called love had been self-seeking desire, the opposite of the love Paul describes (1 Corinthians 13:4-5), and it ran the course James traces from desire to sin to death (James 1:14-15).
- 2 Samuel 13:15 (BSB)“Then Amnon hated Tamar with such intensity that his hatred was greater than the love he previously had. “Get up!” he said to her. “Be gone!””Amnon’s feelings turn to a hatred stronger than his former desire.
- 2 Samuel 13:16-17 (BSB)““No,” she replied, “sending me away is worse than this great wrong you have already done to me!” But he refused to listen to her. Instead, he called to his attendant and said, “Throw this woman out and bolt the door behind her!””Tamar protests that sending her away is worse, but Amnon has her thrown out.
- 1 Corinthians 13:4-5 (BSB)“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no account of wrongs.”True love is patient, kind and not self-seeking, the opposite of what Amnon called love.
- James 1:14-15 (BSB)“But each one is tempted when by his own evil desires he is lured away and enticed. Then after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.”Evil desire conceives and gives birth to sin, and sin when full-grown brings death.
General
True or False: The text records that David punished Amnon after hearing what he had done to Tamar.
Answer: False
This is false. The text says David was furious when he heard all this (13:21), but it records no word of rebuke and no action taken against Amnon. Tamar was left desolate, and Absalom was left to nurse his hatred. A similar pattern appears later, when the narrator notes that David had not once corrected his son Adonijah (1 Kings 1:6), and it recalls Eli, whose house was judged because he failed to hold back his sons (1 Samuel 3:13). David’s anger without action left the wrong unaddressed, and the next verses show Absalom’s hatred filling that silence.
- 2 Samuel 13:21 (BSB)“When King David heard all this, he was furious.”David is furious when he hears what happened.
- 1 Kings 1:6 (BSB)“(His father had never once reprimanded him by saying, “Why do you act this way?” Adonijah was also very handsome, born next after Absalom.)”Later the narrator notes that David had never once reprimanded his son Adonijah.
- 1 Samuel 3:13 (BSB)“I told him that I would judge his house forever for the iniquity of which he knows, because his sons blasphemed God and he did not restrain them.”Eli’s house was judged because his sons blasphemed God and he did not restrain them.
Theological
True or False: The narrator records that David disciplined Amnon for his crime against Tamar.
Answer: False
This is false. David’s fury is recorded (13:21), but no rebuke or penalty follows; the text is silent where justice was needed. The pattern recurs with Adonijah, whom David had not once corrected (1 Kings 1:6), and it recalls Eli, judged for failing to restrain his sons (1 Samuel 3:13). David’s passivity leaves Tamar without justice, and Absalom’s private vengeance follows.
- 2 Samuel 13:21 (BSB)“When King David heard all this, he was furious.”David is furious when he hears what happened.
- 1 Kings 1:6 (BSB)“(His father had never once reprimanded him by saying, “Why do you act this way?” Adonijah was also very handsome, born next after Absalom.)”Later the narrator notes that David had never once reprimanded his son Adonijah.
- 1 Samuel 3:13 (BSB)“I told him that I would judge his house forever for the iniquity of which he knows, because his sons blasphemed God and he did not restrain them.”Eli’s house was judged because his sons blasphemed God and he did not restrain them.
General
True or False: David himself sent word for Tamar to go to Amnon’s house and prepare food for him.
Answer: True
This is true. When David visited his supposedly sick son, Amnon asked that Tamar be allowed to bake for him while he watched, and David sent a message to the palace telling Tamar to go to her brother’s house and cook for him (13:6-7). David did not know Amnon’s intent, but the pretense worked because it came to Tamar with her father’s authority. The scene shows how the trouble Nathan announced would rise from within David’s own house (12:11), and how a deceiver can hide his purpose behind ordinary words (Proverbs 26:24).
- 2 Samuel 13:6-7 (BSB)“So Amnon lay down and feigned illness. When the king came to see him, Amnon said, “Please let my sister Tamar come and make a couple of cakes in my sight, so that I may eat from her hand.” Then David sent word to Tamar at the palace: “Please go to the house of Amnon your brother and prepare a meal for him.””Amnon makes his request when the king visits, and David sends word to Tamar.
- 2 Samuel 12:11 (BSB)“This is what the LORD says: ‘I will raise up adversity against you from your own house. Before your very eyes I will take your wives and give them to another, and he will lie with them in broad daylight.”Nathan had said the LORD would raise up adversity against David from his own house.
- Proverbs 26:24 (BSB)“A hateful man disguises himself with his speech, but he lays up deceit in his heart.”A hateful or deceitful man hides his intent behind his speech.
Theological
True or False: Tamar went to Amnon’s house at King David’s own instruction.
Answer: True
This is true. Amnon made his request when David visited him, and David sent a message to the palace, directing Tamar to go and prepare food for her brother (13:6-7). David was deceived, yet the scheme ran through his own authority, an early sign of the adversity from within his house that Nathan had foretold (12:11). Amnon’s speech concealed his purpose, as Proverbs 26:24 describes.
- 2 Samuel 13:6-7 (BSB)“So Amnon lay down and feigned illness. When the king came to see him, Amnon said, “Please let my sister Tamar come and make a couple of cakes in my sight, so that I may eat from her hand.” Then David sent word to Tamar at the palace: “Please go to the house of Amnon your brother and prepare a meal for him.””Amnon makes his request when the king visits, and David sends word to Tamar.
- 2 Samuel 12:11 (BSB)“This is what the LORD says: ‘I will raise up adversity against you from your own house. Before your very eyes I will take your wives and give them to another, and he will lie with them in broad daylight.”Nathan had said the LORD would raise up adversity against David from his own house.
- Proverbs 26:24 (BSB)“A hateful man disguises himself with his speech, but he lays up deceit in his heart.”A hateful or deceitful man hides his intent behind his speech.
General
When a report said Absalom had killed all the king’s sons, what did Jonadab tell David (2 Samuel 13:32)?
Answer: That only Amnon was dead, as Absalom had long planned
A first report reached David that Absalom had struck down every one of the king’s sons, and David tore his garments and lay on the ground in grief (13:30-31). Jonadab, the same nephew who had devised Amnon’s scheme, corrected it: only Amnon was dead, and Absalom had intended this from the day Amnon wronged Tamar (13:32-33). Soon the other sons arrived weeping, confirming his words (13:34-36). Absalom’s silence had hidden a settled purpose; as Proverbs says, a person who hides hatred speaks with lying lips, and hatred hidden by deception is finally exposed (Proverbs 10:18; 26:24-26).
- 2 Samuel 13:32 (BSB)“But Jonadab, the son of David’s brother Shimeah, spoke up: “My lord must not think they have killed all the sons of the king, for only Amnon is dead. In fact, Absalom has planned this since the day Amnon violated his sister Tamar.”Jonadab tells David that only Amnon is dead and that Absalom had long planned it.
- Proverbs 26:24-26 (BSB)“A hateful man disguises himself with his speech, but he lays up deceit in his heart. When he speaks graciously, do not believe him, for seven abominations fill his heart. Though his hatred is concealed by deception, his wickedness will be exposed in the assembly.”Hatred hidden by deception will at last be exposed before all.
- Proverbs 10:18 (BSB)“The one who conceals hatred has lying lips, and whoever spreads slander is a fool.”Whoever hides hatred has lying lips.
Theological
How did Jonadab correct the first report of the slaughter at Baal-hazor (2 Samuel 13:32)?
Answer: That only Amnon was dead, as Absalom had long planned
The first report claimed all the king’s sons were dead, and David tore his garments and lay prostrate on the ground (13:30-31). Jonadab, who had engineered Amnon’s scheme, now explained that only Amnon had died and that Absalom had purposed this from the day of Tamar’s violation (13:32-33); the arriving princes confirmed it (13:34-36). Absalom’s two years of silence were the concealed hatred Proverbs exposes (Proverbs 10:18; 26:24-26).
- 2 Samuel 13:32 (BSB)“But Jonadab, the son of David’s brother Shimeah, spoke up: “My lord must not think they have killed all the sons of the king, for only Amnon is dead. In fact, Absalom has planned this since the day Amnon violated his sister Tamar.”Jonadab tells David that only Amnon is dead and that Absalom had long planned it.
- Proverbs 26:24-26 (BSB)“A hateful man disguises himself with his speech, but he lays up deceit in his heart. When he speaks graciously, do not believe him, for seven abominations fill his heart. Though his hatred is concealed by deception, his wickedness will be exposed in the assembly.”Hatred hidden by deception will at last be exposed before all.
- Proverbs 10:18 (BSB)“The one who conceals hatred has lying lips, and whoever spreads slander is a fool.”Whoever hides hatred has lying lips.
General
What did Amnon’s friend Jonadab advise him to do (2 Samuel 13:5)?
Answer: Feign sickness so Tamar would be sent to him
Jonadab was David’s nephew, a son of Shimeah, and the narrator calls him very shrewd (13:3). His shrewdness was put to evil use: he told Amnon to lie in bed pretending to be ill and to ask the king to send Tamar to cook for him in his sight (13:5). Instead of warning his friend, Jonadab handed him a plan. Proverbs warns against yielding when sinners entice and says that whoever keeps company with fools comes to ruin (Proverbs 1:10; 13:20), and Amnon’s path ends exactly there.
- 2 Samuel 13:3 (BSB)“Now Amnon had a friend named Jonadab, the son of David’s brother Shimeah. Jonadab was a very shrewd man,”Jonadab, David’s nephew, is introduced as a very shrewd man.
- 2 Samuel 13:5 (BSB)“Jonadab told him, “Lie down on your bed and pretend you are ill. When your father comes to see you, say to him, ‘Please let my sister Tamar come and give me something to eat. Let her prepare it in my sight so I may watch her and eat it from her hand.’””Jonadab lays out the plan of pretended illness.
- Proverbs 1:10 (BSB)“My son, if sinners entice you, do not yield to them.”Wisdom tells the young man not to yield when sinners entice him.
- Proverbs 13:20 (BSB)“He who walks with the wise will become wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed.”The company a man keeps shapes his end; the companion of fools comes to ruin.
Theological
What plan did Jonadab, David’s shrewd nephew, give Amnon (2 Samuel 13:5)?
Answer: Feign sickness so Tamar would be sent to him
Jonadab is described as very shrewd (13:3), but his counsel is cunning in the service of sin: Amnon is to feign illness and have the king send Tamar to prepare food in his presence (13:5). The wisdom literature warns against consenting to sinners’ enticement and against the companionship of fools (Proverbs 1:10; 13:20). Jonadab supplies the scheme, but the will and the guilt for the deed are Amnon’s.
- 2 Samuel 13:3 (BSB)“Now Amnon had a friend named Jonadab, the son of David’s brother Shimeah. Jonadab was a very shrewd man,”Jonadab, David’s nephew, is introduced as a very shrewd man.
- 2 Samuel 13:5 (BSB)“Jonadab told him, “Lie down on your bed and pretend you are ill. When your father comes to see you, say to him, ‘Please let my sister Tamar come and give me something to eat. Let her prepare it in my sight so I may watch her and eat it from her hand.’””Jonadab lays out the plan of pretended illness.
- Proverbs 1:10 (BSB)“My son, if sinners entice you, do not yield to them.”Wisdom tells the young man not to yield when sinners entice him.
- Proverbs 13:20 (BSB)“He who walks with the wise will become wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed.”The company a man keeps shapes his end; the companion of fools comes to ruin.
General
True or False: Amnon’s death at his brother’s command begins to fulfill Nathan’s word that the sword would never depart from David’s house.
Answer: True
This is true. After David’s sin with Bathsheba and the killing of Uriah, Nathan announced that the sword would never depart from David’s house and that the LORD would bring trouble against him from his own family (12:10-11). The chapter does not quote Nathan, but its events match what he announced: one son rapes his half-sister, and another son orders the firstborn struck down (13:28-29). David had confessed and the LORD had taken away his sin (12:13). Forgiveness was real, yet the consequences God had announced still unfolded in his family.
- 2 Samuel 13:29 (BSB)“So Absalom’s young men did to Amnon just as Absalom had ordered. Then all the other sons of the king got up, and each one fled on his mule.”Amnon, David’s firstborn, is killed by his brother’s servants.
- 2 Samuel 12:10 (BSB)“Now, therefore, the sword will never depart from your house, because you have despised Me and have taken the wife of Uriah the Hittite to be your own.’”Nathan had announced that the sword would never depart from David’s house.
- 2 Samuel 12:11 (BSB)“This is what the LORD says: ‘I will raise up adversity against you from your own house. Before your very eyes I will take your wives and give them to another, and he will lie with them in broad daylight.”The LORD said He would raise up adversity against David from his own house.
- 2 Samuel 12:13 (BSB)“Then David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against the LORD.” “The LORD has taken away your sin,” Nathan replied. “You will not die.”David’s sin was taken away, yet the announced consequences still followed.
Theological
True or False: Amnon’s murder begins the fulfillment of Nathan’s oracle that the sword would not depart from David’s house.
Answer: True
This is true. Nathan’s oracle announced that the sword would never depart from David’s house and that adversity would arise from within his own household (12:10-11). Amnon’s crime and Absalom’s murder of his brother (13:28-29) match that word and begin its outworking, though the chapter does not cite the oracle itself. David’s guilt had been removed upon his confession (12:13); the forgiveness was genuine and immediate, while the temporal consequences God had declared still came to pass.
- 2 Samuel 13:29 (BSB)“So Absalom’s young men did to Amnon just as Absalom had ordered. Then all the other sons of the king got up, and each one fled on his mule.”Amnon, David’s firstborn, is killed by his brother’s servants.
- 2 Samuel 12:10 (BSB)“Now, therefore, the sword will never depart from your house, because you have despised Me and have taken the wife of Uriah the Hittite to be your own.’”Nathan had announced that the sword would never depart from David’s house.
- 2 Samuel 12:11 (BSB)“This is what the LORD says: ‘I will raise up adversity against you from your own house. Before your very eyes I will take your wives and give them to another, and he will lie with them in broad daylight.”The LORD said He would raise up adversity against David from his own house.
- 2 Samuel 12:13 (BSB)“Then David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against the LORD.” “The LORD has taken away your sin,” Nathan replied. “You will not die.”David’s sin was taken away, yet the announced consequences still followed.
General
When the chapter opens, Tamar is introduced as the lovely sister of which son of David (2 Samuel 13:1)?
Answer: Absalom
The chapter names three of David’s children at once: Amnon, Tamar, and Absalom, with Tamar described as Absalom’s sister (13:1). Amnon was David’s firstborn son by Ahinoam, while Absalom was born to Maacah, a daughter of the Geshurite king (3:2-3). Because the text ties Tamar so closely to Absalom while Amnon had a different mother, she was Amnon’s half-sister. That family tie explains why the wrong done to Tamar in this chapter is taken up by Absalom, and it shows the sin and division spreading inside David’s own household.
- 2 Samuel 13:1 (BSB)“After some time, David’s son Amnon fell in love with Tamar, the beautiful sister of David’s son Absalom.”The chapter opens by naming Amnon, Tamar and Absalom, all children of David.
- 2 Samuel 3:2 (BSB)“And sons were born to David in Hebron: His firstborn was Amnon, by Ahinoam of Jezreel;”Amnon was David’s firstborn, by Ahinoam of Jezreel.
- 2 Samuel 3:3 (BSB)“his second was Chileab, by Abigail the widow of Nabal of Carmel; his third was Absalom, the son of Maacah daughter of King Talmai of Geshur;”Absalom’s mother was Maacah, daughter of King Talmai of Geshur, while Amnon’s mother was Ahinoam.
Theological
Tamar is introduced as the sister of which of David’s sons (2 Samuel 13:1; cf. 3:2-3)?
Answer: Absalom
Tamar is introduced as the sister of Absalom (13:1). The birth list of 3:2-3 shows why the narrator frames her that way: Amnon, the firstborn, was born of Ahinoam, while Absalom was born of Maacah, the Geshurite princess. Tamar is thus closely tied to Absalom and is Amnon’s half-sister, which sets up the chain of wrong and vengeance that follows within David’s house.
- 2 Samuel 13:1 (BSB)“After some time, David’s son Amnon fell in love with Tamar, the beautiful sister of David’s son Absalom.”The chapter opens by naming Amnon, Tamar and Absalom, all children of David.
- 2 Samuel 3:2 (BSB)“And sons were born to David in Hebron: His firstborn was Amnon, by Ahinoam of Jezreel;”Amnon was David’s firstborn, by Ahinoam of Jezreel.
- 2 Samuel 3:3 (BSB)“his second was Chileab, by Abigail the widow of Nabal of Carmel; his third was Absalom, the son of Maacah daughter of King Talmai of Geshur;”Absalom’s mother was Maacah, daughter of King Talmai of Geshur, while Amnon’s mother was Ahinoam.
General
Where did Tamar live after Amnon’s crime, and in what condition (2 Samuel 13:20)?
Answer: In Absalom’s house, a desolate woman
Tamar mourned, her head covered in ashes; she tore the special robe worn by the king’s unmarried daughters, and went away weeping aloud (13:18-19). Absalom told her to keep silent for now and not take the matter to heart, and she remained in her brother Absalom’s house, a desolate woman (13:20). The narrator does not hide the lasting damage done to an innocent woman. Scripture elsewhere assures that the LORD sees trouble and grief and stays close to those whose hearts are broken (Psalm 10:14; 34:18).
- 2 Samuel 13:19 (BSB)“And Tamar put ashes on her head and tore her robe. And putting her hand on her head, she went away crying aloud.”Tamar shows her grief with ashes, a torn robe and loud weeping.
- 2 Samuel 13:20 (BSB)“Her brother Absalom said to her, “Has your brother Amnon been with you? Be quiet for now, my sister. He is your brother. Do not take this thing to heart.” So Tamar lived as a desolate woman in the house of her brother Absalom.”Absalom tells Tamar to keep quiet, and she lives desolate in his house.
- Psalm 10:14 (BSB)“But You have regarded trouble and grief; You see to repay it by Your hand. The victim entrusts himself to You; You are the helper of the fatherless.”The LORD sees trouble and grief, and the victim entrusts himself to Him.
- Psalm 34:18 (BSB)“The LORD is near to the brokenhearted; He saves the contrite in spirit.”The LORD is near to the brokenhearted.
Theological
According to 2 Samuel 13:20, where did Tamar live after she was driven out, and in what state?
Answer: In Absalom’s house, a desolate woman
Tamar’s public mourning, with ashes, a torn royal robe and loud weeping (13:18-19), is followed by Absalom’s instruction to stay silent, and she remains desolate in his house (13:20). The narrator records the lasting ruin of an innocent victim without softening it. The psalms affirm that the LORD regards such grief and is near the brokenhearted (Psalm 10:14; 34:18).
- 2 Samuel 13:19 (BSB)“And Tamar put ashes on her head and tore her robe. And putting her hand on her head, she went away crying aloud.”Tamar shows her grief with ashes, a torn robe and loud weeping.
- 2 Samuel 13:20 (BSB)“Her brother Absalom said to her, “Has your brother Amnon been with you? Be quiet for now, my sister. He is your brother. Do not take this thing to heart.” So Tamar lived as a desolate woman in the house of her brother Absalom.”Absalom tells Tamar to keep quiet, and she lives desolate in his house.
- Psalm 10:14 (BSB)“But You have regarded trouble and grief; You see to repay it by Your hand. The victim entrusts himself to You; You are the helper of the fatherless.”The LORD sees trouble and grief, and the victim entrusts himself to Him.
- Psalm 34:18 (BSB)“The LORD is near to the brokenhearted; He saves the contrite in spirit.”The LORD is near to the brokenhearted.
General
When Tamar was alone with Amnon and he made his demand, what was the heart of her plea to him (2 Samuel 13:12-13)?
Answer: That this was a shameful act forbidden in Israel
Amnon sent everyone out and called Tamar into his bedroom with the food. There she pleaded with him: what he wanted was a disgraceful deed that must not happen among God’s people, it would leave her with nowhere to carry her shame, it would make him a fool before all Israel, and he could instead ask the king for her (13:9-13). Amnon would not listen and raped his half-sister (13:14). The law had forbidden such a union outright (Leviticus 18:9), and Scripture had called the crime against Dinah an outrage among God’s people (Genesis 34:7). The narrator calls Amnon’s act a violation of Tamar (13:22), and Jonadab later names it the same way (13:32). Tamar spoke for what was right; the guilt was entirely Amnon’s.
- 2 Samuel 13:32 (BSB)“But Jonadab, the son of David’s brother Shimeah, spoke up: “My lord must not think they have killed all the sons of the king, for only Amnon is dead. In fact, Absalom has planned this since the day Amnon violated his sister Tamar.”Jonadab later names the deed plainly as Amnon’s violation of his sister Tamar.
- 2 Samuel 13:22 (BSB)“And Absalom never said a word to Amnon, either good or bad, because he hated Amnon for violating his sister Tamar.”The narrator also names what Amnon did as the violation of his sister Tamar.
- Leviticus 18:9 (BSB)“You must not have sexual relations with your sister, either your father’s daughter or your mother’s daughter, whether she was born in the same home or elsewhere.”The law forbade sexual relations with a sister, whether a father’s daughter or a mother’s daughter.
- Genesis 34:7 (BSB)“When Jacob’s sons heard what had happened, they returned from the field. They were filled with grief and fury, because Shechem had committed an outrage in Israel by lying with Jacob’s daughter—a thing that should not be done.”The violation of Dinah had likewise been called an outrage in Israel, a thing that should not be done.
Theological
What did Tamar appeal to when she resisted Amnon (2 Samuel 13:12-13)?
Answer: That this was a shameful act forbidden in Israel
Tamar appealed to what was right: the deed was a disgraceful thing forbidden among God’s people, it would leave her bearing shame, and it would brand Amnon a fool in the eyes of Israel; she even pointed him to the king (13:12-13). Amnon would not listen and raped his half-sister (13:14). The Mosaic law prohibited such a union (Leviticus 18:9), and the same verdict of outrage had been passed on Shechem’s crime against Dinah (Genesis 34:7). Both the narrator and Jonadab name the act as violation (13:22, 32); Tamar is the righteous voice in the scene, and the guilt lies wholly with Amnon.
- 2 Samuel 13:32 (BSB)“But Jonadab, the son of David’s brother Shimeah, spoke up: “My lord must not think they have killed all the sons of the king, for only Amnon is dead. In fact, Absalom has planned this since the day Amnon violated his sister Tamar.”Jonadab later names the deed plainly as Amnon’s violation of his sister Tamar.
- 2 Samuel 13:22 (BSB)“And Absalom never said a word to Amnon, either good or bad, because he hated Amnon for violating his sister Tamar.”The narrator also names what Amnon did as the violation of his sister Tamar.
- Leviticus 18:9 (BSB)“You must not have sexual relations with your sister, either your father’s daughter or your mother’s daughter, whether she was born in the same home or elsewhere.”The law forbade sexual relations with a sister, whether a father’s daughter or a mother’s daughter.
- Genesis 34:7 (BSB)“When Jacob’s sons heard what had happened, they returned from the field. They were filled with grief and fury, because Shechem had committed an outrage in Israel by lying with Jacob’s daughter—a thing that should not be done.”The violation of Dinah had likewise been called an outrage in Israel, a thing that should not be done.